VINCE YOUNG FINED TOOTHPICK MONEY
The NFL fined Tennessee Titans QB Vince Young $7,500 for an usportsmanlike conduct penalty in last week’s tough loss to Indianapolis.Jeff Cez: Colts d-back Kelvin Hayden shoved at Young’s head, Young responded by slamming the ball at Hayden’s feet… …and what’s the fine for, exactly? You got guys in the league jacked up on monkey testosterone higher than Amy Winehouse with enough evidence in their Escalades to solve a half-dozen “CSI” plots, and you’re gonna nail a guy for tossing a ball …at the GROUND?! Oy. Oy, oy, oy.
MICHIGAN, PENN STATE RE-ENACT GAME FROM 1956
The Michigan Wolverines won their second straight by beating Penn State 14-9.Jeff Cez: Nothin’ like a little stock-footage, ‘50s-era Big Ten Football to set your team straight. I think after they game they took off their helmets, folded them and stuck ‘em in their back pockets. Spread offense? We don’t need your stinkin’ spread! Spread is somethin’ you put on a sandwich, baby. Now take the handoff and let me ram you in the skull with several of my friends.
WISCONSIN, IOWA RE-RE-ENACT MICHIGAN/PENN STATE RE-ENACTMENT
The Wisconsin Badgers ground down a game Iowa team and won 17-13, keeping the nation’s longest winning streak alive at thirteen.Jeff Cez: Wow, that game was like the three hours immediately following the consumption of too much Las Vegas Hilton buffet turkey. Both punters struggled off like they’d just finished the Boston Marathon – weak-kneed, sobbing and draped in an insulation blanket. OKAY FINE, the Big Ten is probably a little down this year. The only fun left is to see if Wisconsin can keep winning but still keep dropping in the polls.
NC CENTRAL, A&T GET 34-TOSS POWER-PEPPER SPRAY
North Carolina Central’s last-second interception saved a win against arch-rival North Carolina A&T and sparked Central’s victory dance on the A&T mid-field logo – which triggered an all-out brawl that was broken up by police using pepper spray. Jeff Cez: Wow, pepper spray?! Who do these two teams think they are, Miami and Florida International? Wofford-Appalachian State? A drunk pawing a barmaid at a strip club? Anyone who says anything bad about Dick Cheney?
