BODE ACTUALLY DOES NOT OFFER A COLOGNE
American alpine skier Bode Miller failed to medal in his five events, meaning the most indelible mark he left on these games was his Nike ad campaign for Bode.com.Jeff Sez: I like this guy and I agree completely with his theory that American kids are quitting sports and getting fatter than veal calfs because we emphasize winning over participating. But I got lost in the middle of the "media expectations" ad, and I really didn't grasp the one about...I think it was about eating, or snack bars? They got too hip for the room. Saying to hell with other people's expectations is healthy - but it doesn't mean you should have ZERO expectations for yourself. Words like 'goals' and even 'disappointment' can be kinda healthy too.
MY NEW HEROES: SNOWBOARDERS AND THEIR 'TUDE
America's single most successful squad at the Olympics in terms of medals was the men's and women's snowboard teams.Jeff Sez: THIS is the image we should be plasterin' on telephone poles all over the world - smilin', easy-goin', long-haired snowboarders. The Flying Tomato wins a gold and what bolts out of his mouth on an honesty rocket? The phrase, "I'm freaking!" Win or lose, (even losing on a hot dog move), they'd still look in the camera like, "Damn. Too bad. Ah, get 'er next time. Anyone have a Mentos? Hey, what'd you get there, Mr. Francy France, bronze? AWEsome! Yer buyin' pizza!" If my bones weren't as brittle as bad holiday candy, I'd give snowboarding a try. I still may.
MY OTHER NEW HERO WHO WILL NOW NEED A RENT PARTY: JOEY CHEEK
American speedskater Joey Cheek donated both his bonuses - $25,000 for his gold and $15,000 for his silver - to a kids' athletic charity, Right To Play.Jeff Sez: Maybe they should prop open the eyes of Chad Hedrick and Shani Davis ala "Clockwork Orange" and make 'em watch Cheek donating these checks a thousand times in a row. Wow. I think even Mother Theresa would say, "Dude, keep a taste for yourself. Heating fuel is going up, you know." That's it, I'm goin' upstairs right now and puttin' a bag of clothes together for Goodwill! ...except the Ralph Lauren pullover, I might get decent coin for that on eBay.
