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This is the kind of publicity
Aquafina just doesn't need.
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Lake Laker, CA - Los Angeles
Lakers head coach Phil Jackson has sent
guard Derek Fisher to Eagle, Colorado with strict
instructions to replace starting guard Kobe Bryant
in Bryant's upcoming court appearances and rape trial. "It's
clearly a legal substitution," said Jackson, "it comes
after a summer-long timeout, it comes when Kobe's tired, and everybody
in the league knows, Fisher's better on defense." A trio
of Eagle, Colorado's top criminal court judges, consisting of
the boat rental guy, the guy who runs the antique mall, and a
bartender, are taking the substitution under advisement. Added
Jackson, "Hey, they substitute attorneys in and out, why
not defendants?" At this point Alan Dershowitz
called Jackson to tell him how much he loved Kobe Bryant's 'reckless,
almost musical style of play' and that he and Jackson should have
lunch Friday. Derek Fisher had no comment but told the team physician
that his "ankle was all funky and sh*t" and he didn't
think he could tolerate pressurized airplane cabins right now.
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