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This Week's TUBSTER TIPS

 
The Line
   

Greetings folks, what is happenin'?! Wow, I had some health problems, serious trouble was oh...so...close... But hey, "take the under" when it comes to the Big Boy! I'm flyin', jackson, and ready for ACTION!

...okay, my jaw's wired shut and my hands are bandaged and I have to type this usin' a straw I hold in my teeth, but when a man's got tips, he's gotta get 'em out there!

...how'd my hands get bandaged from a simple stomach staple surgery? Well, when the surgeon left his brisket sandwich in my gullet, and my tummy muscle took a whack at reachin' it all on its own, they had to go back in and get the lunch out... That put me back in the intensive care recovery unit, and of course, without vocal cords (when my o-ring blew it shot bearclaw shard through my esophagus and WOW - that stung...) I couldn't ask for the nurse to up my Vicadin drip.

...so I tried to signal the nurse using semaphore! But what I THOUGHT were two flags actually turned out to be a nurse's curling irons, and well, there went the palms of my hands!...

Anyway, enough about me, let's get to some tips!! Let's get them potato chips headed in the right direction!! Let's get back on the horse and... and...

...oh God, I'm tired. My jaw hurts from holding the straw. Can we do this next week? Or my name ain't...

The Tubster

We all know unsanctioned gambling is illegal, and Sportalicious! would never condone it. But if you're playing at the kitchen table, an innocent game with your kids using potato chips…knowledge is power, that's all we're saying.

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