NCAA FINAL FOUR ROUNDTABLE...
Castagna:
Look at those brackets. Suck. Suck.
Suck.
Chet: Y’know, that includes you.
Castagna: I should be in the Caymans right now.
Mr. Stats: The mathematical probability that
all of us together would have none of the Final Four teams is
the odds equivalent of IUPUI winning the tournament.
Tubster: Is that some kind of dig? The IUPUI
crack?
Mr. Stats: I was still in the hospital last week.
Anthem Singing Breasts: What did they give you
for pain?
Mr. Stats: Vicodan
Anthem Singing Breasts: Oh.
(long pause)
Anthem Singing Breasts: Do you have any left?
Mr. Stats: Yes I do. I detected a little gastrointestinal
discomfort so I discontinued them, even though the pain in my
jaw is excruciating.
Anthem Singing Breasts: Could we try one?
Mr. Stats: Sure.
Chet: You’re giving drugs away like a common
thief!
Castagna: I’ll take one too, ladies.
Tubster: They got more kick if you eat ‘em
with food.
Castagna: Chet. Sweetheart. Try one. Relaaaax.
(long pause)
Chet: Kinda sweet aftertaste. Uhhh, Tubster,
how ‘bout pizza?
Tubster: Already beepered it in. Two large, one
mushroom one cheese.
Anthem Singing Breasts: That’s soooo wierd.
We order that all the time.
NOTE: "Chicago" did not
technically advance in the NCAA tourney, but it did win an Oscar.
