Mock t-shirts are in this Spring.

Electric Fence Hollow, CT - On the heels of yet another crushing Tiger Woods victory in last weekend’s Bay Hill Invitational, ten east coast blue blood families banded together in secret negotiations and announced a plan to create a new elite sport for only the privileged rich. “Obviously, golf is shot,” said alliance spokesman Kib duPont, “and yes, I’m from that duPont family.” DuPont said preliminary meetings indicate the game will still be played on country club courses so as to keep property values outrageously high, and will consist of a slightly larger ball, some sort of launching and/or firing mechanisms, and equipment that will be made entirely from platinum, uranium, Black Sea caviar and diamonds so as to be cost-prohibitive to the general public. “There’s minor quibbling on how to incorporate the private space rockets, but the bottom line is ‘No Riff Raff,’” said duPont. “That means you, Monsanto, you freaking chemical trailer trash, and everyone who makes less than you!” Names for the new game have been narrowed down to ‘Snob,’ ‘Posh,’ ‘Rod Up Your Ass’ or possibly ‘Platinum Dodgeball.’