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Dateline Foxboro, MA - On the heels of
their 47th straight playoff collapse, the Indianapolis Colts
told a group of reporters forced to cover their arrival back in Indiana
that somehow, somewhere prior to departure from Boston's Logan Airport,
star quarterback Peyton Manning slipped away from the
team and took the first flight to Nepal. Passengers at the Fat Buddha
Airlines gate said Manning shoved his way past them throwing hundred dollar
bills at the ticket agent, who promptly let Manning on, gathered up the
over-two-thousand dollars in cash, shoved it in his pockets and immediately
renounced Buddhism. When contacted by reporters, the main Buddhist temple
in Nepal said rather reluctantly that they would take Manning in despite
having lost a "significant amount" on the Colts/Pats over-under
bet. "We take all spirit who lost," said Dalai Yama, "but
we no talk to him for good two months. Three point? Three point total?
Not 'Colts.' More like 'Dolts.' So much for 'inner mounting flame.'"
Yama justified this un-Buddhist like outburst when he revealed the monks
in his monastery had used their Hot Tub Fund for the bet.
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